Kōrero: Sex work

Mary Brennan works as a dominatrix under the name Mistress Mariah, at her BDSM (bondage, discipline and sado-masochism) salon in Lower Hutt. A dominatrix is a female sex worker who specialises in bondage and discipline (both physical and psychological). This does not usually involve sexual intercourse. Brennan says that people who pay her to act out their fantasies of being dominated find her establishment a place where their desires can be fulfilled. She argues that it is therapeutic for people to act out their desires in a safe way without fear of judgement or ridicule.

Transcript

A lot of my clients talk to me about the fact that they have tried over the years to deny their desires, whether it be cross-dressing or whether it be torture or whether it be foot fetish or whatever it is. I've spoken with people who have been to psychiatrists, psychologists, their marriages have broken up when their wives or partners have found their cross-dressing gear in the wardrobe or found instruments of torture in the boot of the car. 

So I'm seen in a lot of people's lives as someone very special because clients can be completely open with me and honest if they can tell me about their wives, their family, their job and they can tell me about their unusual desires because it's me that they come to to live them out. It's like hands on psychotherapy really. That's what I find so rewarding about what I do is that I see people actually get stronger through this and receive healing, receive stress relief, you know, walk in with the weight of the world on their shoulders and leave looking like they're 10 years younger. So these things are not harmful to anybody, their desires that are being lived out with a consenting adult. They are something that often the person who has these desires doesn't know where they come from. They can't explain them, but they just have to satisfy.